10 years ago I married my high school sweetheart, the man of my dreams, my best friend, my soul mate. The day after we got married I said to Adam, I want to do that again. He laughed and said something along to lines of “oh dear god” and we agreed right there on day [...]
The first word Ashton learnt to write was his own name. The second was his brother’s. I had no idea he could write it until a remembrance event where he showed me the bamboo candle boat he decorated with Elliott’s name on it. “That’s so beautiful darling, who helped you with his name?”, I asked. [...]
7 months... Every month on the same day (the 28th) no matter how good the day or week was, as the night draws in I'm brought back to the fact time is passing. Another milestone to hurdle over when I never trained for jumping such heights. I'm glad to say I'm having more genuinely good [...]
I am (or was) a social person. In fact I've made my career out of talking. I love to dress up and meet with friends. And yet when my best friend bought tickets for us to go see a show I panicked thinking "how am I going to do this?" (especially knowing it was on [...]
Last night I sat in bed on my laptop and out of the blue I decided to count how many days it had been since Elliott was born. I counted...100 days... I was gripped with an unbearable sadness, 100 days already has gone by, 100 days in the rest of our lives. I did wonder [...]
Like stars, foxes have also become a special symbol of our baby. My sister purchased a star for Elliott on the day he was born located in the "Indus" constellation (which amazingly is the brand name of the blanket we laid him on to rest) and Indus means "little fox". I don't think we'll ever [...]
There's nothing more so than the a death of a loved one which makes you start wondering about the afterlife. It makes you start questioning everything and hoping with everything you have that there is something, and that something is peaceful and beautiful. Since Elliott I find myself looking for signs... After receiving news he [...]
Elliott's Stardust 